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9/27/2005 Unfinished ThoughtsLimiting Progress
Why is there such a constant movement in our society today to stop progress? If our society today cannot deal with the differences between races, gender, sexuality, religion, and so on, how are we to deal with future societies when there are robots, cyborgs, intelligent life other than humans, longer living humans, people who have adopted really advanced technology, or people discovering and founding a major religion? The politicians and writers are attacking the wrong areas of life. Too Idealistic
Apparently, I'm a hippy. Not in the 1960s' sense, with flowing bell-bottom pants and tie-dyed colours covering me from head to toe, but in the sense that I'm wanting to live in a better world. I've always thought that the way to live life was to live for improvement of the human species, but the rest of the world doesn't seem to be living that way at all. It's no wonder I'm constantly being confused with where my life is going. Where I want it to go is not welcome in this world at all.
This surprises me for several reasons. For one, the world is full of examples of progress towards a better human or society. Popular religions, technology, education, hospitals, social welfare programs, etc. I would hate to believe that all of these various institutions are moving not in the direction of progress but have alterior motives within them. It depresses me to think that this world is focused on power and money, and institutions that should be helping are deceiving the people that use them. With all the corruption that's happening around us, why should I shut up and accept it? Is the purpose of my life to go out and get the most money I can to ensure that my children and their grandchildren can live comfortably, or should I be working towards a better world for them to be living in? The one thing I don't get is how come all the various militias of the developing world are killing the poor citizens? I would think they would want to work together with those citizens, win them over to the cause to take down the corrupt governments that are ruling them. It seems kind of backwards to kill off the people that may want to support these groups and help them defeat their collective enemies. 9/14/2005 PassionMy one big flaw as a person is passion. I'm just too passionate of a
person to exist in this world. You would think this would be a good thing, not a
bad thing, but all it brings me is trouble. I get myself into trouble because
some people don't care about things at the same level as I do, so I get upset at
them. I care so much about some things that I'd go at lengths to protect them,
no matter what the cost- and sometimes that cost is illegal or immoral. I find
myself getting drawn to people more easily than I should, because I get attached
to certain aspects of their character. Or I construct my feelings in such a way
that I begin to think I'm in love with someone and care for them on a much
deeper level than they would ever think of me. I get frustrated with myself
because I can't express the feelings I have for these people. Either they're
involved with someone else, or I've known them too short of a time period, or
the manner in which we met is socially undesireable so it could be viewed as
threatening to express myself that way. Apart from the short-comings of my own personal character, passion gets me into trouble with how I view the world and life. I am easily riled up by someoone or something continually failing in a task or doing something that should be perceived to be wrong. For example, a lot of people with power are concerned only with the economic play-out of Hurricane Katrina - meaning, can they earn money off of this. Innocent lives perishing can be viewed as a good thing if it improves the lives of others, no matter how local or distant they are to the situation. Any premature death is a waste in my mind, especially if they said person doesn't have a fighting chance to survive. So whereas if someone dies while climbing a mountain is a waste, they put themselves into that position to risk death (which is probably a part of the reason for climbing the mountain), but the people drowning in the nursery home in New Orleans didn't have the option to escape. So many deaths in the world are not necessarily the fault of the person who died, but rather the community and species as a whole. Too many people are pulling themselves away from these situations so they no longer have to think about it. The tragedies of life happen over there, not here. We are all guilty of having these thoughts, but I feel like I'm aware of what is going on in my mind. That sounds silly, but what I mean is I can sense myself pulling away from a situation while watching it happen on television. Most people tend to see something on television then click the remote to another channel and forget about it. These things are always lingering on my mind and the only reason why I push them away is because they are on my mind so much. I would never get anything done if I kept thinking about what's going on in the world. That's probably why I'm not doing anything, too. After my contract ended in June, I've had over three months without work. All that spare time has been spent reading and watching news events unfold, or reading commentary about historical events that are similar to what is happening in the present. The passion within my chest has kept me locked onto these findings so that they never escape my mind. A lot of people have asked me what I'm planning on doing with my life post-Syracuse. My answer to them feels like a lie, while still being the truth. I want to go to graduate school, or I want to continue working in theatre, but right now that feels so ... selfish and insignificant. I want to play a part in this world, not be merely a living citizen on it. So my mind wanders to the possibility of working for an organization like the Red Cross or Salvation Army, etc. But that also feels wrong to me. All of these relief agencies are just a band-aid for a larger problem in this world. All the money in the world being pumped through these organizations isn't going to end poverty, disease, slavery, the use of children in war, or rape, etc. What's needed is a larger political shift, a new revolution to counter the so-called revolution known as a capitalist-democracy. It cannot be the answer if our world continues to have these problems after centuries of capitalist thought and practice, and the continuing re-invention of democracy. But how can I solve this problem while working in a non-profit organization? How am I helping the world if I work in technical theatre the rest of my life? Is that all life is worth - work with fun on the side for personal pursuits? Doesn't that seem rather dumb when our world and our minds have the potential for greater things? Or is my mind a sham? Are the passions taking me too far with my ideas and taking me off the beaten path of both reality and idealism? Am I no better than the raving idiots on the conservative talk radio or Osama bin Laden, Hitler, Napoleon, Ghengis Khan, etc? Will my mind never rest and give me a clear answer for where I should be going? Please, help me if you can. 7/27/2005 Open Source TheatreI had an idea today while walking home after delivering some books to a used bookstore. Just wanted to jot it down quickly before I ended up forgetting about it. Open Source Theatre would allow a community to come together and write a script to be performed. This task would be completed over a period of time, say a month or two. People would come to the theatre, and have to attend a one hour workshop (perhaps longer) that would involve the director of the piece, possibly designers, and actors. They would have a discussion about the project, what an open source project is, why they're doing it, and what is to be expected. There would be a talk about the play they're working on, why it was chosen and what kind of style they may after. After taking part in the workshop, the people could go into a computer lab or sorts at the theatre and work on the script. There would be at least four terminals at first, perhaps expanding to include more if there was a great demand. There would be no time limit for how long they could work, as long as there was sort of respect if the place was busy. Each terminal would ideally be running a Linux distro to keep the open-source theme constant throughout the entire process. It would also lower costs, since Linux is free and there are more than enough computers available cheaply for word processing. I would like to have it so the word processor (most likely OpenOffice.org) wouldn't allow the deletion of text, only the movement of it around the pages. This is to prevent someone from erasing the entire document (backups would be made, of course) or typing crass language continually. Defeats the purpose of the task at hand. Lines could shift between characters, or characters be given long monologues, and so forth. When the deadline has been reached for the text, a play reading would be given. No actions or movement allowed, just vocalizing the words on the script. There would be discussion afterwards about the worthiness of the script, whether it fit into the whole plan of the project, or if parts didn't make sense, etc. A period of editing would happen, then another reading. Perhaps this process would continue for three or four drafts. For the rehearsal period, all rehearsals would be open to the public so they could see the play in development. Suggestions would be listened to during intervals, just to ensure there was progress in the actual rehearsal and it didn't become a large discussion about the play again. This would continue for two months, minimum, to allow for plenty of time for experimentation, suggestion, progress, etc. At the same time, a set would be designed. A set designer would supply a basic design that could be flexible to manipulate into other sets. A series of building blocks to be added, subtracted, shifted, placed on top, in different locations, etc. They would also design a palette of paint to be used, to make sure the design was coherent and not plain ugly. Again, volunteers from the public would paint the set the way they wanted it to look. There would be edits to it, repainting over old work, or a few basic additions to it. Costumes would be handled in a similar way. We would supply magazines and catalogues, letting people cut out the shapes of clothing they would like to see and begin making collages of the characters. This would continue until everyone was happy, then the clothes would be made or bought. After each performance, there would be a discussion about how to improve upon the acting, the blocking, or the delivery of the text. A month after the final performance, the text would be archived on a webserver in various formats for people to print off and read. There would also be a streaming video on the website for people to watch. Possibly, earlier drafts of the script or video from rehearsals would be published for people to see the evolution of the piece. It's an ambitious project that would depend greatly on the organizers to keep things moving smoothly and quickly, as well as an enthusiastic public willing to play with a creation that would be unique to their community. 7/16/2005 LanguageThis sort of pertains to me, but not really considering how I grew up in Canada- but I was raised by American parents. I was curious to see where I would fall in the world of American language. The results:
Makes a lot sense since my grandparents and parents grew up in Wisconsin, Ohio and spent time in New York and Conneticutt. Not sure how the Dixie and Midwestern comes in (possibly from Saskatchewan?) but still kind of interesting. If only they made a Canadian one, eh? 7/7/2005 BeliefWhat is the nature of trust and belief?
I'm wondering if evolution has changed how humans think of trust/belief and how we ultimately decide whether we do trust someone or not. In my mind, the beginnings of trust and belief belonged with witnessing the leader of your tribe do an action (like killing an animal for food). The tribesmen would view this action and decide on their own that the leader should continue be the leader. The leader did not need to prove his worth to the others except through his actions, or inactions. The system was basic and had very little room for a wrong decision, at least, on the end of the tribesmen. The leader still had the pressure on their shoulders to provide, but they were able to focus on that goal.
In our modern world, I feel like this trust and belief has been muddied and twisted into a whole other contraption. We no longer get to witness our leaders in action and get to make up our mind about that person. Today, we are fed a constant stream of images, of words, of stories from a large number of sources. The arguments for and against the leader(s) is a "he said, she said" deal, rather than obversation from the tribesmen. Whereas in the past, it was the action that was significant and the telling of that action memorable (the story), today it is the opposite: the story is more significant and the action becomes more memorable.
Here's a few crude examples to prove my point, first from the past, then from the present.
Story A:
Charlie goes up to Bob, in front of a dozen spectators, and stabs him with a knife. Bob dies in front of the dozen people, who bow down in fear of Charlie. They know he can kill people and is powerful. They write stories so we can remember how Charlie behaved that day and worship him. The stories evolve so the action seems even larger than life, that it was destiny, or an act of God that did this to Bob. In the recent future, they will see Charlie and remember that day's events; the future will remember the stories and preserve Charlie's history that way.
Story B:
Charlie goes up to Bob, in front of a dozen spectators, and stabs him with a knife. Bob dies in front of the dozen people, who know surround Charlie to get his response to the death of Bob. What his reasoning was, what his future plans are now, etc. They no longer fear Charlie, but want to understand Charlie so they can better place their trust in him. They turn away and tell their stories to the people. People begin to forget that Charlie killed a man, but remember Charlie killed Bob because Bob was a ruthless rapist in the past, and it was his destiny to die at the hand of Charlie. The recent future and the further future forget that Charlie killed Bob in front of all those people, but rather it was a justified murder by Charlie, and that Charlie would never kill again. They remember the layers of information built up on top of the action, not the action itself.
In case you didnt' pick up the distinction between the two, in Story A, it was the observers who created the stories; in Story B, it was Charlie creating his own story to sell to the people, despite there having been witneses. In the past, the general population took a story and let it grow amongst them, while in the present, the people involved are doing the work for them. The exaggeration of a story comes from the people involved, and not in the people just hearing it wrong.
Here's a more complex and relevent example:
Action we can indirectly observe through cameras and photographs: thousands of American and international soldiers being at war in Iraq.
The layers: Bush says Saddam Hussein has weapons of mass destruction, we can't trust him, is a major threat to the world, is harboring terrorists, we went to war to bring democracy to the middle east, to give people a better life, etc.
When we remember this war, or for that matter any war, we will never remember it solely as Bush going to war against Iraq. We will remember it as Bush going to war against Iraq to bring democracy there, or protecting the world from an evil dictator. We'll remember how much corruption exists in the country, how long it took to accomplish, how much death was lost, but in the end it was a good thing to happen. We're going to believe that the war was necessary and completely forget the fact that it was a fucking war. No matter what happens in the future, we'll always remember the layering stories on top of this action and forget what it really was.
Now, why would we allow this to happen in our society? The power structures evolved and grew larger. What was once a tribe leader and tribespeople, has become a king/president, a senate, a parliament/congress, and the people way down at the bottom. The people could no longer see the events that were taking place by their leaders. If the leaders had told the people plainly that, "We attacked a country and won," the people will start to have visions of what that invasion looked like, felt, and create their own reasons for why it happened, just like in the past - the story growing to support the action. Except, the problem was the people couldn't see the action so their stories were highly inaccurate and possibly damaging to the leaders/government, etc.
The solution to this was to create a media, a way to get the leader/government's message out to the people to describe what happened, why it happened, how it happened, etc. The government, in corporation with the media, took away the power of controlling the stories from the people and put it into their own hands. The stories they told were elaborate, and the media supported them, so over time the people became to believe in them.
Gone were the days of deciding whether an action was good or bad. That decision was now being told directly to us and we either believed it, or we went against the government. The government could protect themselves from this dissent by calling out to the rebels that they were aligning themselves with the devil, because they were going against the grain, standing up against the good of the people.
Since this system was to believed in at the higher levels of government, it made sense to the people to accept it at the lower level as well. We could no longer lead by example. We had to explain our actions to everyone around us to protect ourselves, and the others, so people could agree that what we were doing was good. It wasn't an option to do things on our own and let people make their own decisions. We now had to conform to the higher ideals that were being placed upon our society by government.
Somewhere in this journey, the feeling of doubt was created. Relying on our gut instincts was useless in the modern world, because we were now told to compare the actions to a higher level, an abstract rule. When witnessing an event, or hearing it through the media, we now had to decide whether this action was agreeable to this abstract idea or not. When something happened that involved the leader, you had to rely on the information they provided you. The more information they dump on you, the more likely it becomes that it may not be true or just. You start to have doubts that it is right, but you can't clearly say "It is wrong" or "it is right," because you lack critical information (witnessing the event) and you have to compare it to something that isn't concrete. How can you condemn something if you're not even entirely sure of the guiding principles yourself? You can't play the role of god, so you get comfortable with the feeling of doubt and let the world correct itself.
... to be continued.
7/4/2005 Britney SpearsWhat the fuck, eh?
No, seriously. Check this drawing out: Britney Spears
Incredibly good stuff.
Found here: Poisoned Rose RevolutionI came across this lovely and intelligent blog: SpeakYourPeace
I found myself responding to quite a few posts already, and I've only been reading for 30 mins. I thought, I should just post them up here, as well.
Addendum... Jean-Michel JarreIf there ever was a saviour for music, I think I discovered him. Jean-Michel Jarre is just astounding to listen to. His music is composed mainly on synths, so has a late 70s-80s feel to it, but it doesn't sound cheesy at all. I was quite relieved to start listening to some of his music and be able to get into a serious groove with him. The music varies between being very melodic and soothing, to music that could easily fit into a DJ's line-up at a rave.
Jarre's latest album is the first to be recorded completely in Dolby 5.1 surround sound. Unfortunately, I don't have a surround sound system to play it on, but the effects in the headphones are pretty neat. Usually the sound comes out pretty steadily to both ears in a lot of music you hear on the radio or rock CDs, and such. With this CD, you feel like you're dancing in music. I felt such weightlessness listening to this CD- sounds coming at you in any direction, a melody bouncing between the left and right side, a low rumbling starting off on the left then building to a large beat in the right, and so forth. It's like listening to music on LSD - or, at least, what I would imagine listening to music would be like on LSD...
One of the best parts of the album are all the scenes between the main tracks. They act like the entre-acts of musicals, echoing the previous track and preparing you for the next one. They're all quite simple sounds, but constructed in a complex way that impressed this listener. For instance, you could hear a few loud knocks on the door to your left, and then it progresses into footsteps walking through the room tracking towards the right. The knocking on the door actually caught me off guard, because it sounded like something hitting my window. I felt like a fool when I realized it was actually in the headphones. Normally, I can distinguish between the sounds in the headphones and outside, but not with this CD. These scenes were a nice touch to the CD. My favourites involved the slamming of a car door. You'll have to listen to find out why, but it was such a simple idea that was executed perfectly.
Finishing this off, this CD is a must have for any electronica lover. With the variety of genres built into this disc, it's sure to please anyone who listens to it. With the subtle bass lines, to the airy melodies, and the jazz-influenced saxaphone sounds, it's perfect to listen to after a night of dancing. It will surely pick up the person who's in a down mood, and if you're already in a down mood, it'll just finish off your night that much better. Be sure to check out his site and buy this CD the next time you're in a music store.
Jean-Michel Jarre's official website.
JarreUK - a fansite in the UK.
Aero - the CD I was listening to tonight. 7/2/2005 Open Letter to America, pt IIDear America:
Independence Day is nearly upon us. Usually, it is a time of celebration, going on picnics with friends, hitting the beach, watching the fireworks. After a drunken booze fest weekend, we all go back to work and carry on with our normal American lives. It is one of the only weekends of comraderie, but then it disintergrates- at least, in the larger cities. Because of this, I'm issueing a challenge to all of America for the following year, starting July 5th, and not January 1st.
A) Fraternite'
Whatever happened to building a community and neighbourhood? Is it really necessary for people to live for themselves, or just their family members, when there is so much pain and suffering happening within a few miles of them? As I mentioned in an earlier post, people have become jaded to the term "9/11" now, and just like that event, people are seeing but not seeing so many other issues happening around them.
One example of this is the poor, but an even more obvious one is the environment. As difficult as it is to give a stranger money, sometimes, you just don't have the money on you, but there is no excuse for dropping garbage on the side of the road. There are streams of garbage in any city of any size. There's garbage in small communities of a few hundred. Thousands of years have gone by and along with all our civilizations' problems, one of the main ones that never goes away is garbage. Why is it that we can solve polio, and have computers at home, and get to the moon, but we can't be bothered to find a solution to the bits of plastic we keep creating?
Imagine for a moment a time when all citizens are required to report for garbage duty, like jury duty. Every citizen in a city devotes one or two workdays a year to picking up garbage off the side of a road. If this happened just one day a week through the summer months, and maybe once a month in winter, the city would be so much cleaner. Groups like the Boy Scouts will go clean up garbage along the edge of a highway, but we completely ignore our backyards. Five hours out of the year is not much to ask for, and maybe if people are confronted with the problem directly, maybe, just maybe, we could change how we live.
Another aspect of community is how we get to work. I don't need to get into the problems that our current modes of transportation give us, but imagine instead the communal ride to work. Streams of workers getting onto buses and avoiding their cars altogether. The commute to work would be people talking together, forming larger networks, and be able to relax. I highly doubt anyone is truly productive on the subway or train trying to do work before they get into the office. Let a job stay a job at the office, and don't start your day any earlier than you have to. Communities build safer, stronger, smarter cities. I challenge anyone out there to pose to me the problems that would exist in a united community centre.
B) Egalite'
This goes hand-in-hand with the first item, but deserves expanding. There are hundreds, thousands, millions of different points of view in the world. I don't agree with all of them, and I probably shouldn't either. Agreeing with a statement/ideology may be too much, too extreme to handle. But the opposite of agreeing, denouncing it, is not proper either. What we need is a society who accept the fact that other ideas exist and encourages the expansion of thought in the world. The collective thoughtpool of our species is what has allowed us to survive for so long, so we should embrace ideas and not steer ourselves towards a monothought civilization.
The most dramatic acceptance of thought is how we are gathered together as a people, the political and sociological thought. I wrote another post about this, so I won't delve into it again. The second, and possibly even more important, is through how we treat our morals and what is dear to us. This net I'm casting covers everything from gay marriage, legalizing marijuana, whether eating an animal is right/wrong, whether eating a dog or cat is tasty/disgusting, or whether right-handed people are smarter than left-handers.
It is not wise to become too comfortable in this environment, especially in the modern age where ideas that used to belong solely inside an individual are becoming more known through blogs, webpages, podcasts, cellphones, etc. The thoughtpool is a volatile place, constantly shifting, adding pieces to it, taking away, etc. Always evolving, the thoughtpool is a place to explore and play. People may call space or deep underseas the last great frontier, but those spaces have nothing on the thoughtpool. Unlike its finite cousins, the thoughtpool can go on forever if it so wishes and nothing short of killing every single computer on the earth will stop it. It's an impossible task.
Like our ancestors who refused to change to their world when it changed with the Ice ages, or were unwilling to try a new animal as a source of energy, the human who becomes conservative in their mindset will soon be extinct, left behind for an era that we humans have surpassed. The way forward is acceptance; the way backwards is ignorance.
I want America to explore this thoughtpool with an open eye and arms spread wide in an embrace. There is only one way to get into the thoughtpool, and that is to immerse yourself in it. Talk with people of different backgrounds, read authors outside of pop culture, surf the internet and read different websites, listen to different kinds of music. Get involved with different activities and you, and America, will benefit. You will ensure the survival of the human species.
C) Liberte'
Because the lack of acceptance in the great nation of America, thousands of men and women are in trouble. Our society is too swift to knockdown a voice of dissent, and America goes all out in its punishment of these people, short of execution. Perhaps execution is on the horizon if we continue in our ways, but these individuals are publically humiliated on a large national front, books become banned/unpublished, maybe prison. The United States has become one of the conservative regimes of the Middle East that we have despised for so long.
A cleaning of the slate is needed. Allow the free thinkers to go free and be the people they are meant to be. Humiliate and punish the people who initially harassed these great minds. Crack down on the people who throw weak insults and excuses at these people, and only allow credible, intelligent discussions to happen about the ideas presented. The slandering of ideas is not only unproductive, it is a dangerous activity to be undertaking. Promoting inner-conflict to separate the people destroys our society and all the energy that went into creating it. Clubbing people with words and not ideas is such a primitive thing to do.
The solution to this problem is much more difficult than the previous two problems proposed. It's going to require the solving of the other two issues before you can adequately tackle this major issue. To solve it is going to involve the complete and utter upheaval of society to embrace original thought and condemn the attitudes of people who do not appreciate those ideas. We need to get rid of the businesses that feed upon people's misfortunes or plant a revolution inside them. Newspapers will need to change to present ideas and not rely so much on nonsense "news." Television stations will have to adapt to have roundtables and more townhalls where serious thought can be exchanged between people and create a new idea. Television will turn from supporting one main idea to the development of more ideas and the exploration of current trends around the world. Gone will be the days of guests coming on the show and preaching to the public about their cause without hearing the other side at all. Politicians will have debates that are constructive and not the rehashment of old ideas. Society will be dumped on its head but when it turns back up, the world will be much brighter and more brilliant than ever.
There is much more to add to this letter, but I shall end it now. Three steps to a better society, and towards a better world. Are you up to the challenge, America? Let me hear your response if you are.
7/1/2005 Kodak DX6490, How I love thee...I am becoming obsessed with my digital camera this past month. I bought the camera last year, around this time, actually, as a graduation gift for myself. I figured after six years of going to school at Univeristy, working fulltime the past three years, and a total of 18 years in school, including elementary through to highschool graduation, I deserved something.
After a bit of browsing online, and scanning through eBay, I found my new best friend. It certainly wasn't cheap, but it offered everything I wanted without me purchasing a real professional camera. I couldn't afford the latest and best thing, so I settled for a little below that.
All of the pictures on this site were taking with the camera. except for the giant starfish sent to me by my brother. Today, I wanted to see how well the zoom could go, so I was playing with taking shots farther away than I would've liked and trying to pick up objects. It worked quite well. I was getting some nice pics of guys playing cricket (yes, cricket) on campus, and could pick up some couples walking along the sidewalk. I don't want to publish those though- that's a bit creepy. So instead, I'm going to include a few pics I took today.
Now, this demonstration is quite simple. One pic is a close-up, the other isn't. If you look closely at the broad shot, you'll see the small buildings I focused on for the close-up.
Let me know what you think of the quality of them.
[Edit]
After posting, I realized it's pretty impossible to see the point where I meant, so I added another pic with a convenient label of "Over here." Open it up in a new window and you should be able to see what I meant. Open Letter to America for Independence Day, July 4th, 2005.As a Canadian living in America for the past year, I've had several startling revelations about life here and the American way. Three of them have been quite prominent in the American media and public sphere this past week.
First, the basic idea of capitalism is to take advantage of situations that allow you to make the most profit. We should not be attacking Spielberg for opening up the wounds from the tragedy in New York City. If it was his intention to do so, as some critics claim, he is doing nothing wrong. He is using the system that has been developed for hundreds of years for his, the film's cast and production team's benefit. Instead, let's put the blame where it is due: not on the man who is opening the wounds, but instead the men who caused and allowed the wounds to happen (bin Laden, George Bush, Sr., Bill Clinton, George Bush, Jr.). It would be the just thing to do that than to attack a bystander merely holding up a sign.
Second, you are no more right than Spielberg when you call forth the wounds of 9/11. The tragedy of September 11th has been soiled by the constant reminders by people like yourself, other media outlets, and all sorts of politicians. When the young generation growing up through this period become adults, the phrase "9/11" or "September 11th" will have no emotional attachment to it except of boredom. There have been so many references to that day in so many different contexts that the pains we felt as a nation, and as a world people, have diminished dramatically. We should never have let this happen, but we did, and we all must battle back to regain our lost emotions.
So please, writers of Syracuse, let us remember that day the way we remember it happening. Do not bring it up in hopes of uniting us against a movement or using it as the focus of an article on a slow day. Reflecting back to that day belongs in the hearts of the people in solemn moments, not in constant daily reminders. And let us hope that we shall never have to endure a day like that again, ever.
And, finally, I am appalled at what advertisers keep calling "patriotic" or "The American Way." I overheard a car salesman ad on the radio today saying that buying a new car was "patriotic." A small part of me thought no big deal of it- if this is the way Americans would like to live their lives, consuming and separating the social classes even further, then so be it. But that moment passed by quickly when I realized that the dealership was selling Hyundais, a South Korean car. That's absurd. Supporting an American company that brings in imported cars, while American car plants continue to be shut down? That's not the patriotic way; that's the idiotic way.
On this coming Independence Day, I hope the American people could look within themselves and see how hypocritical their country has become. Perhaps in 21 years when the United States celebtrates its 250th anniversary, we will have a clearer picture of what it means to be American; hopefully, it will be a better lifestyle than I have witnessed recently.
6/25/2005 LanguageInteresting note: Mandarin Chinese has nearly a billion speakers in the world. Next is Hindi. But Hindi has only 300,000+ speakers, a significant drop off. English and Spanish are in the 300,000s, as well. German and French are below the power house languages of Bengali, Porteguese, Russian, and just above Malay. Adding up the top twelve languages of the world gives a total of 2 billion and 883 million. There's roughly three billion people speaking a language that is fairly "unique." Malay has 50 million speakers, so I'm guessing that most of the other languages are in the 10-20 million range with several being in the 30+ million range. Anyways, that's a lot of languages in the world. Amazing how every culture has developed their own language independent of most of the others. Another interesting tidbit, all of these words have roots in the Arabic language (just a small selection): admiral, alchemy, alcohol, algebra, almanac, apricot, candy, checkmate, coffee, cotton,crimson, gauze, ghoul, giraffe, guitar, hazard, lake, lime, magazine, massacre, massage, mattress, mocha, monsoon, mummy, orange, racket, safari, sesame, shackle, sofa, spinach, sugar, syrup, talisman, tambourine, tariff, typhoon, zero. The English language is so corrupt, stealing great words from other languages and using it for their own. Too bad we couldn't be more original. KindnessWhat's wrong with humanity? When someone is down and hurting, the advice given out more often than not is to "suck it up and deal with it." Everyone is too busy to do anything to help you because they don't want to help the needy. For instance:
Now I can understand the motivation from within, but when the person doesn't even have the motivation to wake up in the morning, how is abandoning that person actually helping? Do you really need people to become the "I don't give a fuck" kind of people? Isn't that how acts of war are really started - I don't care what the cost of human lives is, but it has to be done. If Bush truly did care about people, he'd be helping out the poor and the sick, not dipping his fingers into someone else's candy dish. It really concerns me that our society has turned from our primitive tribe mates having to band together to overcome nature's problems, to wanting to continually push people out of the cave and become these aggressive, selfish hermits. How are we to survive as a species if keep doing this? Is the lack of time the real issue here, or are people lacking the energy and heart to do what needs to be done? Are they taking the easy road so they can return to being couch potatos and watch their televisions? Is there anyway we can reverse this problem? Or is it even a problem? Am I just lashing out because no one gives a fuck about what I do anymore? Am I taking this personal issue way too personally and not respecting the other person's wishes, even though I gave said person a significant amount of my life to make sure they didn't do anything stupid and were able to get their life up and running again? Why does all this crap have to land into my lap during possibly the worst year of my life? And why am I so fucking nice to everyone else when no one seems to appreciate it? And why do I keep asking so many questions in these posts and in life in general? Shoot me. I know you want to.
6/22/2005 L| i` |3 /\ f\jA new identity. I was getting bored with JM2145 and Urban-Hermit seemed too plain, not to mention too cliche it seems. I was surprised at how many other sites existed mentioning urban hermits, so I felt a new name was in order. But I didn't want to use words. I was watching a documentary on Muhammed and Islam and was getting mesmorized with the calligraphy of Arabic. What a confusing language to read, but it looks wonderful when the time is taken to do it properly. http://www.arabicbible.com/images/arabic_graphities/ezekiel36_26.jpg is a good example of what I mean. While looking for an example of this, I found another link: http://www.sfusd.k12.ca.us/schwww/sch618/Calligraphy/Islam_Arabic_Calligraphy.html It looks like a good introduction to the language, and includes a few online lessons on how to actually draw the language. Very neat stuff, and much more complicated than I thought. Letters are formed differently depending on where they are in the word. Must be a tough learning curve to learning the script. No wonder English has become so popular in the world - our language is so dumb. :P Anyways, I wanted my new name to have some simplicity to it, but try and find a calligraphic art to the ascii text. I think it looks pretty good, but I'm sure a lot of people will find it dumb looking and not understand what it says. When I was watching the documentary, I was surprised at how humble a religion Islam really is. The beginnings of Islam seem much more heroic and noble than Christianity was. The way people talked about it during their interviews and profiles, it made me want to look further into it. Foolish thoughts, perhaps, but if I have time, maybe I'll do some more reading. In the mean time, the new name looks even better italicized: L| i` |3 /\ f\j يَكُونُ جيّداً ويَتمتّعُ بيومَكَ (Be well and enjoy your day - thanks to: http://www.almisbar.com/demo.html ) 6/20/2005 Gypsy BloodSomeone mentioned to me tonight that I must have gypsy blood still running through my veins. I had to pause and think about this. I agreed, this is completely true of my life at this moment. I am quite restless in my actions. My mind is always on the go, not focusing on any one area of interest. I can find myself reading for hours about a variety of topics that are generally on opposite ends of the spectrum. I have an open mind, willing to take in everything I hear and contemplate it, consider its worth, whether it's a negative or a positive force. I'm never satisfied with where I'm living. I wasn't fully happy in Whitehorse, Yukon. I wasn't completely happy in Regina, SK. I wasn't happy in Hartford, CT. I wasn't happy in Regina when I returned there. And now I'm not happy here in Syracuse, NY. Is this because of the people I meet, or am I bound to be a restless person the rest of my life? I won't deny that there are great appeals to being a journeyman in life. I could be meeting numerous people with a great variety of backgrounds. I could see all the sites in the world that are meant to be seen, and discover all the private areas that only a select few have settled on. I would get to taste exotic foods, or the plain ones that are always satisfying. But then I wonder if I'm running away from something. Is this gypsy blood causing me to escape a personal fear I have of settling down and being married, being scared of a 9-5 job, being scared that I may not be a good father or husband in life? Or am I searching for something that I don't know exists, searching for that perfect woman, for that perfect job, for that perfect situation that allows me to do everything I dreamed of doing and then everything else I haven't even thought about? Why is my mind full of questions that have no answers? Maybe it's my curiousity that is driving me, my thirst for knowledge. My lust for intelligence. Whatever it is, I'm cursed with gypsy blood. MemoriesTonight, I was feeling lousy, real shitty. I was close to just opening up a large bottle of Smirnoff Ice and staring off into space. I don't need to discuss why I was feeling so crappy, but how I got myself out of that funk. I decided to go onto Limewire and search around for some more Robin Williams' clips - after a friend gave me some the other night. I found plenty of them, but with a little more searching I found my saviour for the night... Fraggle Rock. It was amazing. After how many years of it not being on television, I was thrilled to discover that it lives on. What I didn't realize was how popular it was on the internet. People have devoted entire pages to this show. With a little browsing, I discovered that the entire season one of the show is going to be produced on DVD because of the fans signing a petittion. Supposed to be in the fall, in September. Can't wait. In the mean time, I had season one, episode one, waiting for me. I was anxious like a kid again seeing it. I think it had one of the most memorable theme songs ever, something real catchy that the kids could sing along to. I had forgotten how music-centred the show was, but it's still quite enjoyable after all these years. I loved seeing all the old fraggles again, from Gobo, to Red, to all the little doozers running around (for puppets, these little guys are friggin' complicated), to the gorgs and the trash heap with the two rats. And Sprocket, loveable, poor Sprocket. What a torturous life that dog had staring into that hole in the wall. I'm very glad Jim Henson created this show for kids, along with some of his other memorable hits. He was pure genius and really understood what kids needed while making its lessons worth learning. It's sad to have him gone now, but I'm glad I lived through his era. On the flip side of all this was a video of Nirvana's Lithium performed live at the MTV video awards in '92. I was a young teenager when Nirvana made it big, so it seemed appropriate that I would be watching this after seeing Fraggle Rock. What caught my attention the most while watching this was how raw it was. The three men, on stage, minimal lighting - no flashing or moving lights- with a videoscreen behind them showing their image. Even the stage space was small and up tight against the fans - who towards the end were jumping on and off the stage. I want to say it was moving, but that sounds sappy. It was powerful stuff, with no movement besides a few sways, minus the drumsticks flying around. And at the end, it became destructive and degenerated into noise, while the guys trashed their set, as usual. Such a contrast to the million dollar sets and large spectacles that are produced now on stage. It's as if the music business has to cover up the crappy songs with epic events to brainwash the fans into watching it. Nirvana's performance was anything but splashy. It was crystal clear, with Kurt's words dancing on top of the guitars. And it was live. No lip-synching here. Kurt was even late getting into a verse. All in all, it was a good way to top my never-ending night. And at least I'm still sober and haven't even tasted the alcohol yet. So thank you Fraggle Rock, and thank you Nirvana. [side note- the moon was golden red tonight and was moving like a jet in the sky. Went from a peak to nothing within 30 minutes. Very bizarre, but interesting to watch] 6/19/2005 Macbeth ProjectThis is just a brief post to notify anyone who cares, I've started to publish another blog that deals with a project I've been working on for almost a year now. There's no official name to it, so I'm calling it the Macbeth Project. Basically, I'm adapting Shakespeare's play Macbeth for a future performance. I've hit a roadblock with it, so I figured publishing it online may help me stay motivated to completing it. More details over there. May be interesting for people who enjoy theatre, Shakespeare, and craziness. 6/16/2005 DemocracyA thought occurred to me while I was watching Glory and thinking about the American Civil War. There was a comment made in the film about how the men were going back to battle like their grandfathers or great-grandfathers did during the American Revolution. So I started thinking about the American Revolution and who the people were who wrote up the Constitution and having the meetings in the tea shops and so forth. Here's what I found, thanks to http://www.ushistory.org/declaration/signers/ (I'm only going to list the big names) Benjamin Franklin: we all know what an great inventor he was, and he opened up his own printer's shop, wrote a magazine, etc. When the Declaration was being written, he was a member of government and rich. John Adams: prominent public figure, activist, member of various governments, Vice president and then president. Most likely wealthy through all his activities. John Hancock: a few things stand out: 1) his uncle died and left him one of the largest inheritances in New England at the time, and 2) "In 1768 his sloop Liberty was impounded by customs officials at Boston Harbor, on a charge of running contraband goods. A large group of private citizens stormed the customs post, burned the government boat, and beat the officers, causing them to seek refuge on a ship off shore. Soon afterward, Hancock abetted the Boston Tea Party. " Great. A rich, corrupt man. Interesting. Samuel Adams: John Adams' brother, and "son of a merchant and brewer. He was an excellent politician, an unsuccessful brewer, and a poor businessman." Also a politician. Thomas Jefferson: lawyer, academic, founded the University of Virginia, politician, inherited a large plot of land with house, rumoured to have slept with a female slave or two, president. I could take this further, but I'm starting to get a little tired here. What interests me is how many of these men (and the others I haven't listed) are lawyers, land-owners, businessmen, politicians, etc. It's the men living in the icing of the cake and not the actual base of the population writing up. It made me start to wonder about what governments (federal, provincial/state, and municipal) would look like if it wasn't up to the elite (intellectually, financially, or resource wealthy) who developed our current governments. What would a government created from the slums look like? What would a government made up of blue collar workers look like? Would society progress or regress with more or less bickering and selfishness? Oh, crazy thoughts, why must you torture my mind at 4am? Movie: GloryGlory is a classic film that should receive as much respect as other great war films, like Platoon and Saving Private Ryan. More in line with SPR than Platoon, Glory is about what men will do to achieve the unatainable. But like Platoon, it is also about the human spirit and how men cope with disaster and triumph together. From the demoralization of the men intially in the training camps, to the abuse of them as labourers, to the triumph of their initial success on the battlefield and the excitement they hold as they march out to the last battle of the film, the human spirit lives on in the 54th regiment of Massachusetts. Glory takes place during the Civil War in the United States, and is based on the letters of the Colonel Robert Gould Shaw sent to his parents back home in Boston. Shaw has been given the task of the organizing and training of the Union's first all-black regiment. There are many challenges to be had with this rough assortment of men, including the fact that one of the enlistees is a good friend of Shaw and the Major. The prejudice against the company is extremely high, but the men perservere with assistance of the Colonel. After a while, they are assigned their first task near the frontlines. Once there, the morale drops again. Tensions grow stronger and a rift breaks out amongst the camp, with Denzel Washington's and Morgan Freeman's characters in the middle. Watching the camp bond together again is inspiring to keep our hopes alive. If these men risked their lives to fight for their freedom, as well as their ancestor's freedom, living in the great racial division of America, we should be able to accomplish our small feats for the sake of our own lives. I've read other reviews that say the battles are the weakest part of this film. They fail to raise our emotions and let us attach ourselves to the battle, they say. But the film is not about the battles. It's about the men, the human spirit. Watching this grounds you in who you are as a person and makes you question some of your actions against others, your prejudices and your own personal arrogance. Who are we to put ourselves above others? We should embrace eachother as we belong to the same species. Another recommended film. 6/15/2005 Movie: City of God.City of God is a film that I rented from MovieLink.Com (which is a video rental site where you download movies directly to your harddrive and then are removed automatically after a given time limit). I was feeling kind of bored tonight and wanted something a little gutsy to watch. Naturally, I turned to the Foreign films section and started browsing. I didn't have to go too far when this film popped out at me. |
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